patriarchy

Episode #154: Is Hierarchy In Relationships Ethical? Let's F*cking Talk About It.

Is hierarchy in relationships ethical? A very important question that folks in non monogamous and monogamous relationships alike have been asking and unpacking and holy balls, do we have a lot to say about this subject.

I’ve had a WILD ride when it comes to hierarchy in relationships since I was in high school. Although I didn’t have the language at the time (and internal knowing and understanding that I could exist in any other ways), I’ve always been a queer, ambiamorous, demisexual relationship anarchist. AND I also externally looked like I was existing in and choosing a wildly heteronormative, “traditional” relationship that appeared very hierarchical. And yet, it wasn’t that at all.

Today, we talk about, simply, if hierarchical relationships are ethical.

Hint: (you guessed it), my answer is clear and also nuanced, ‘cause there are so many systems and structures in place in western society that makes this answer much more complicated than a hard YES or NO.

And, as always, I share what experiences I navigated in rectifying with these things in my own personal unlearning process around all things toxic monogamy culture, the patriarchy, heteronormativity and beyond. Let’s get the f*ck into it.

LINKS MENTIONED IN TODAYS EPISODE:

Episode 134: I’m Addicted To You Don’t You Know That You’re Toxic Monogamy

Fucking Queer Merch - use code QUEERDO for 15% off / proceeds go to the Brave Space Alliance

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Amanda’s book, I Chopped Off My Tits

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Episode #146: Scars Don't Mean You're Broken

We all have scars.

The physical ones that we see, and all of the ones that are there that we can’t.

But we feel them. We know them. And, sometimes, we discover we have them years into our adult lives and the shame, the guilt, the overwhelm of processing it all can be all consuming and incredibly fucking daunting to face.

TW: self loathing, body image, medical procedures/needles

In todays episode and in honor of mental health awareness month, Amanda talks about her journey with scars — both physical and beyond. And shares some truth bombs & support around how you can start your own journey in detaching yourself from the shame and guilt of the scars you keep.

LINKS MENTIONED IN TODAYS EPISODE:

Episode 144

Amanda’s book, I Chopped Off My Tits

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Patreon - join her “close friends” list on Instagram at the $5+ level

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Episode #144: The Growth Is In The Unlearning, Baby

Todays episode is all about the “growth mindset” mentality vs. the process of unbecoming, unlearning and coming home to ourselves that so many of you asked Amanda for after her instagram stories last week.

As someone who lives her life outside of many of the traditional norm boxes that our society is rooted in, this has been on her heart big time, lately, and it’s clearly been on yours too. We’re surely a unique bunch and the Live Your F*ck Yes Life community wouldn’t be what it is without all of you — my fellow people pleasing, trauma navigating, queer and/or non monogamous humans (and beyond!)

So pop in your headphones, snag something yummy and cozy if it feels good to you & let’s dive in.

TW: eating disorder cycles, diet culture, trauma, panic attacks

Things she talks about in todays episode:

  • The desperation for true belonging

  • The environment of the “fit in” mentality to thrive and be enough

  • The good and the harmful pillars around the growth mindset & pop culture “hustle & grind” mentality

  • Her experience moving from Canada to the US at nineteen and how growing up in and around immigrant families has impacted her experience living in the US

  • Moving through the “starving artist” trope for the last decade as an actor & performer

  • The impact of capitalism, the patriarchy & white supremacy on her choices, paths & perspectives

  • Navigating feelings of broken-ness, fear, lack of purpose, panic & beyond