queerness

Episode #158: Cultivating Queer Community with Rainn Thomas

This is my fifth pride out as a queer person, and I would be lying if I said that I haven’t felt at a loss on how to being to find queer community. Part of queer-ness isn’t just going from thinking you’re straight to knowing you’re queer and then voila, you’ve got the queer life of your dreams. It’s a whirlwind of unpacking comp het, going through queer puberty (I used to scoff at the idea of this but it’s a thing), and finding where you feel the most at home and yourself in your queerness.

Not to mention getting your brain unf*cked from the patriarchy.

These are conversations I have in my own circles, often, and I’m so grateful to have someone like Rainn in my own life to learn from and converse with. And I’m even more stoked that they agreed to come on the pod for us to have one of these conversations with all of you.

If you aren’t familiar with Rainn (She/They), she is a Black lesbian artist and writer living in Chicago. She’s the Host and Co-Organizer of Fruit Salad, a monthly queer open mic. Her writing has appeared in several online publications, and her second poetry chapbook, “In our hands, citrus” will be released later this year. Her artwork has appeared at Co-Prosperity Sphere, The Whistler, The Robin in the Martin, and The Franklin.

Things we talk about in todays episode:

  • how the fuck to make queer friends

  • their queer timeline and how she’s navigated all things non monogamy, internalized homophobia and de-escalations in their relationships

  • why lesbianism means so much to her

  • how to know where you belong

  • local artist & queer community, and the way she’s personally contributing to it with Fruit Salad

  • all things chosen family, sapphic love, power dynamics in relationships and beyond


ALL THINGS BEDUCATED:

Get 40% off yearly pass for Beducated — use code: fuckyes

Best part? You can try ALL Beducated courses for 1 Day FREE! You won’t get charged for the first 24 hours so if it’s not for you, you can cancel.

ADDITIONAL RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Rainn’s Instagram

Fruit Salad | Dorothy Downstairs | The Martin

Fucking Queer Merch - use code QUEERDO for 15% off

WORK, SUPPORT & CONNECT WITH AMANDA:

Snag one of Amanda’s June somatic embodiment coaching pop up sessions : 60 mins | 90 mins

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Amanda’s book, I Chopped Off My Tits

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Episode #147: We're Here & We're Queer | A Conversation on Fluidity with Kiana Lewis

Photo by: @tonals.corner

How the f*ck do we even begin to feel at home in our queerness, let alone cultivate queer community when we’re starting to come out and own our sexuality?

When I first came out four years ago (this month!), I felt SO damn confused. And SO damn alone. And, to be honest, I often still struggle to feel connected to my queerness beyond my individual self.

Learning from Kiana and, honestly, just watching them live their life so damn connected to her queerness and authenticity has been so liberating for me — and I knew you would all resonate SO strongly with and learn so much from their energy, her story and their lived experience as a queer, and former non monogamous, person.

If you’re new to all things Healing Is Imperfect, Kiana (she/they) is a Black queer twenty something in love with her partner, her friends and her cat. She is a sex educator, pleasure mentor and sex work advocate. They believe in the past, present and future liberation of all people through fighting anti-Blackness, centering the queer and trans community, and connecting to whatever one considers spiritual. Kiana has learned from and is fueled by pleasure activism. She loves dancing, being by bodies of water, analyzing too many things and quoting their favorite TV shows and movies.

Things she highlights and what we talk about in todays episode:

  • their journey doing sex work

  • taking nudes & the safety/fears around sharing our bodies

  • honoring our lineages through the work we do & the way we show up in the world

  • the multiple phases of our coming out journeys

  • how they began to cultivate their local queer community & where you can start with your own journey

  • going from 5 years of non monogamy to monogamy in their current relationship

  • the struggle of dating cis men, navigating the patriarchy, gender expression, identity politics and beyond


CONNECT/WORK WITH KIANA:

Their Instagram @healingisimperfect

1:1 Pleasure Mentoring via The Expansive Group

ADDITIONAL RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Get all your self pleasure & partnered play vibes with Dame pleasure products — AMANDA10

Sexy safer sex practices for all my vulva ownin’ baddies with My Lorals Undies - AMANDA10

@_sagetheflame @queersextherapy

Inventing Anna

It’s About Damn Time

WORK & CONNECT WITH AMANDA:

Patreon

Amanda’s book, I Chopped Off My Tits

Amanda’s Instagram | Website

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Episode #129: Bisexuality, Polyamory & Coming Home To Yourself | A Q&A episode

PODCAST BLOG PHOTO (92).png

Todays episode is a little different & fun — I’m answering some incredible community based questions around all things sexuality, polyamory and beyond.

I haven’t done a q&a episode in a while, and while I answer questions all of the time on Instagram and Tik Tok, it’s really tough to really peel back the curtain and answer with any level of depth on those platforms. So today, we’re getting down and dirty in the goods.

Pull up your headphones and press play to laugh alongside of me and rock out this special episode!


LINKS MENTIONED IN TODAYS EPISODE:

Live Your F*ck Yes Life Virtual Summit

Sign up for a 1:1 peer support session - for all things polyamory

Youtube version of this episode

WORK & CONNECT WITH AMANDA:

Amanda’s Instagram | Website

Amanda’s book, I Chopped Off My Tits

1:1 coaching with Amanda — I am accepting 1-2 new coaching clients for 2021. Apply here to set up an initial call to see if this work together is a good fit.

Join her email list & get access to her fears & feels embodiment playlists